The Pathetic, Transformed

Recently I wrote to a very good friend, and in my letter I mentioned something about celebrating the small things of stay-at-home-mom housekeeping and homeschooling life. I wanted to encourage her that even miniscule matters can be viewed as victories. But afterward, I thought about what I had said and wondered how well I was really living out my own advice.

I had said something like, “Life can be hard, but we can motivate ourselves with the reminder that we are accomplishing something, even if it starts with the fact that we got out of bed today. Maybe we made that bed. Yay! That’s an accomplishment to celebrate!”

From one angle of looking at it, this may seem depressingly pathetic. It almost did to me after I wrote it.

I sometimes feel that I would like to celebrate something more “meaningful” — like a child’s graduation from college or the purchase of a new and better house, you know what I mean?

So what’s this “I got out of bed today” stuff? If that’s all we have to celebrate, our lives must be pretty pitiful, right?

No, no, no; wait a minute — something is out of place. Why don’t the small things matter? Even though the big things seem so wonderful, there’s a place for the small things, too. No accomplishment is too tiny to count.

Think about a farmer. (No, I’m not a farmer, but I’ll do my best to make this analogy as accurate as I can.) He has to do some pretty “dull” stuff, like prepare his plot of dirt for planting. He has to mix in smelly fertilizer. He has to make some mounds in the dirt called “furrows.” He has to plant a few itty bitty hard things called “seeds.” Then there are menial jobs that come afterward like watering, weed-pulling, and pest-killing. Every day an “awfully boring” task awaits him (at least that is how it may seem to other people). Goodness — why do people want to be farmers, anyway?

One simple answer: Because without them, we’d starve.

Is raising a family so different? There are many rudimentary tasks that need doing every day. These include things like getting out of bed in the morning and wiping off children’s boogers; breaking up arguments and meting out logical consequences; helping with math problems and administering spelling tests; plus, so many, many more ordinary obligations.

But —

What is this all leading up to?

Another sort of harvest. Not food; people — a harvest of people. All these things that seem so pathetic — they are important. They are necessary steps in the process. They must be done with consistency and faithfulness. We are raising up children for God, and this responsponsibility is crucial. Boring at times, but crucial.

So we celebrate getting out of bed in the morning, and making the bed — we should! If we didn’t do that, we wouldn’t be able to move on to the next part of our day; we’d be stuck under the covers forever. Now, if that’s all we ever celebrated — if there were nothing more — than yes, one would have good cause to feel sorry for us. But that’s just one thing; there are plenty of others. And all these small achievements add up. They converge together into something larger.

Do you think we will look back on this time spent with our children at home and consider it a waste? Even though it meant having to tolerate sleepless nights, mess, noise, tediousness, frustration?

Just like the farmer, we are needed.

We can celebrate the small thing as a victory because in the end, it isn’t small. It’s part of the process of preparing for harvest. This is the pathetic, transformed.

“And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.” Galatians 6:9

“. . . he who is greatest among you, let him be as the younger, and he who governs as he who serves. For who is greater, he who sits at the table, or he who serves? Is it not he who sits at the table? Yet I am among you as the One who serves.” Luke 22:26-28

Can you relate to that weary, exhausted feeling? Here are a few more inspiring posts to read:

Finding Rest as a Busy Mom

Managing Five Children Under 10 Years of Age

A Must: Self-Care for the Busy Mom of a Large Family

~Jessica

23 thoughts on “The Pathetic, Transformed

  1. Hi Jessica! This was BEAUTIFUL! We may not be cultivating crops, BUT we ARE cultivating people! (I.e our children). This is NEVER “pathetic”, it is VITAL!

    1. Hi Courtney – the feminist lobby often refer to traditionalist Christian and Quiverful women as “breeding machines” or “farm animals” – not exactly flattering terms but I have no problem in accepting that it is God’s purpose that we are there to conceive, and nurture his creation. It is a blessing to be fertile not an insult.

  2. Dear Jessica,
    I wish you and your family a blessed new year 2023.

    At the beginning of a new year or at the beginning of a new day when getting up, we may consider the truth of the following old hymn:

    “With the Lord all things begin. Childlike trust in Him forever, Building on thy own strength never, Humbly keep from pride and sin. With the Lord all things begin.
    With the Lord all things begin. Jesus as thy Shepherd choosing, how couldst thou the goal be losing? Safe’s the path He guides you in. With the Lord all things begin.
    With the Lord all things begin. Courage from on high descending, Gladly see thy labors ending, God o’erhead and heart within. With the Lord all things begin.”
    (German original text: Christoph Christian Hohlfeldt 1833; Translator in English: F. W. Herzberger)

    Blessings, Karin

  3. As always beautifully written. It is not always easy to see through the fog of tiredness and the chaos of family life but motherhood is truly a gift from God and in conceiving, giving birth, nursing and nurturing we are devoting ourselves to God and following his plan in the most important way and the way he meant for us as women.

  4. It is hard work but very rewarding to plant, watch the plants grow, and harvest.
    How do I know? Grew up on a farm, married a farmer, plant a vegetable garden almost annually 😁
    Children should know where their food comes from!!

    1. Teann, Yes, isn’t that true: watching that growth can be very rewarding! Sometimes growth in our children seems to happen so slowly, it can feel discouraging at times. However, if we think back to a year ago, or perhaps a few years ago, usually we can see the progress.

      So neat to hear that you grew up on a farm, and that you are still continuing to “farm” in your garden!

      Thanks for sharing!
      ~Jessica

  5. Many people seeks blessing outside home and feels that staying at home for family is not much worth compared with their activities outside.
    I do not deny importance of working outside to serve people, to support oneself and family. And we should thank workers who support our life.
    But after long journey as a christian woman,I came to think that we often find greatest blessing in a unknown small place like home more than in an eye cathching place.
    Serving family is a great job.
    And you always remind me of that with your beautiful article!

    1. Sanae, thank you for replying with those words of wisdom. Yes, I agree that the greatest blessings can be in the unknown, small places. Sometimes we may feel that we are not accomplishing much — but we are. God knows how important our job as homekeeper is.

      I’m glad you liked the article!
      ~Jessica

  6. Dear Jessica,

    « Thanks be to God for his inexpressible gift ! »2 Cor. 9 v.15

    This verse speaks about Christmas, now behind us. Thank you for your article, for sharing about feelings. We all have, good and less good feelings.

    I dare write a few words, will they bring you encouragement in your every day enormous tasks ?

    Our children have grown up. Our three older children have themselves a family with children, now to train to learn to trust the living God. Our number 4 got married last Summer with a young lady who believes also in our God and Savior.

    Our youngest is preparing a birthday party for her thirtiest birthday. Do you know our praying request on her behalf? We pray God that He might grant her what is written in Psalm 113v. 9 :

    He gives the barren woman a home, making her the joyous mother of children. Praise the Lord!

    Now, I want to send greetings with still other words from the Psalms, where we read this:

    The Lord has been mindful of us; he will bless us;…he will bless those who fear the Lord, both small and great. May the Lord give you increase, you and your children! May you be blessed by the Lord, who made heaven and earth! Psalm 115 v. 12-15

    Sincerily, Marguerite

    1. Dear Marguerite,

      I love what you said in your comment! Yes, you are very welcome, my friend, to “dare” to write me a few words!

      As I read those verses from the Bible, it was a beautiful and encouraging reminder to me that God gives increase — including the increase of children — as a blessing to those He loves. Thank you for sharing how you pray — as a godly mother — for your children to have godly, blessed homes. How wonderful to know that!

      Thank you, again, for taking the time to express your thoughts. I greatly value your input!
      ~Jessica

  7. May I add two other verses I found these days? One about the joy of Harvest. It is found in Isaiah 9. It says in vers 3: “Thou hast multiplied the nation, thou hast increased its joy; they rejoice before thee as with joy at the harvest, as men rejoice when they divide the spoil.”
    Concerning our fatigue, when all is not yet done, and our awakening in the morning with the question: how can I manage? But also perhaps when all is done, but there is no reward, or I can’t see it. In Colossiens we read this in chapter 2:”For I want you to know how greatly I strive for you … and for all who have not seen my face, that their hearts may be encouraged….”

  8. “He who is faithful in what is least is faithful also in much; and he who is unjust in what is least is unjust also in much.” -Luke 16:10

    His lord said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.’ -Matthew 25:21

    And I smile at your very apt use of the word “pathetic,” for you have hit the heart of the matter. As Paul says, “If in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are of all men the most pitiable.” (1 Corinthians 15:19). If we look on what we do as the world sees, our labors may appear insignificant. But if we are “seeking first the kingdom and His righteousness,” we know the reward that waits for us!

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