Modesty

How Modest Skirts and Dresses Help Define Femininity

Modesty is:

Having enough respect for ourselves and for others to cover up what we could show off . . . if we were more vain.

Agreeing with God that nakedness is shameful.

Adorning our “temples” (bodies) with loveliness and humble dignity.

Loving Jesus and others more than sexy or fashionable outfits; cherishing God’s word and obeying it.

-Jessica, The Heavenly Hearth

🌿NOTE: MODESTY RESOURCES ARE LISTED AT THE BOTTOM OF THIS PAGE.

It is my belief that the way we dress is an extension of what we believe — about ourselves, about our relationship to others, and about God.

As Christian women, dressing modestly — especially through a skirts-and-dresses-only lifestyle — carries with it a bold statement, a visible message that we are in agreement with biblical, old-fashioned values. Old fashioned, but not outdated.

This article explains why I wear skirts and dresses every day.

A Subliminal Message

Women of previous decades knew what feminine dress represented, and some fought against it:

By wearing pants, a woman outwardly associated herself with the authority exclusively held by men. In daring to be photographed while wearing trousers, these iconoclasts broke the delicate and fragile mold in which the ideal female image had been made and re-created themselves as autonomous and self-made women.

This brief quotation is from the introduction to the book Women in Pants: Manly Maidens, Cowgirls, and other Renegades (page 17). Clearly, wearing pants became a “thing” for more than practical reasons. Though it is reasonable to dress in non-constrictive, safe, and simple clothing, this does not necessarily mean we must dress like men to do it. There are ways of dressing in a practical, feminine way without wearing pants. It would seem, then, that these mold breakers were rebelling against more than tight corsets; they were rebelling against what they considered restrictive roles.

Ultimately, they were rebelling against God.

What the Bible says about clothing:

Though the Bible does not say the exact words, “Thou shalt wear skirts and dresses only,” it does tell us to dress modestly:

“In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel . . . ” (1 Timothy 2:9)

and to be distinctly feminine:

“The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man . . . ” (Deuteronomy 22:5)

It equates nakedness with shame:

“I counsel thee to buy of me [Jesus] . . . white raiment, that the shame of thy nakedness do not appear . . . ” (Revelation 3:18)

and our bodies with the temple of God:

“What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost [Spirit] which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s” (1 Corinthians 6:19-20).

Yes, it can be possible to wear pants modestly and to even look feminine in pants through our appearance overall — I’m not saying that it can’t be done. I’ve seen numerous godly, virtuous, beautiful Christian women be modest and feminine in pants, and I think they look lovely! But it is my belief that wearing modest skirts and dresses is what marks us definitively as ladies of old-fashioned values in the strongest way possible.

That, to me, is a key distinction. There is what is acceptable (modest, feminine pants); then, there is what is optimal (modest skirts and dresses).

It may surprise you to know that I do not believe the Bible teaches that men should wear pants and that women should wear dresses. I believe the Bible teaches that we should dress in alignment with who God created us to be, and to do so modestly (meaning without pride, vanity, or in a sexy way). This may look slightly different in diverse cultures. However, the principle of role distinction and sexual propriety remains the same.

In our particular Western culture, historically influenced by biblical values, dresses still have meaning. Go to almost any store that sells clothing: will you ever find dresses or skirts in the mens’ department? Never. But you will in the womens’ — because even in our degraded culture, there still remains a glowing ember of sanity, a surviving relic pointing back to the roles we once understood so well.

Why do I choose skirts and dresses only? Because they are the most feminine, and because if worn properly, they can cover up the womanly areas of my body more modestly than pants.

It’s just common sense — common sense that meshes perfectly with divine revelation.

We might ask ourselves:

Is how I’m presenting myself through my behavior, words, and dress an accurate representation of the God Who is in me? Am I showing His holiness? His hatred for sin? His purity? His light? His independence from all that is evil and wrong and twisted? His love for order, which includes an order for our earthly roles?

God provided Adam and Eve with coats of skin to cover their nakedness (Genesis 3:21). Will we now uncover it? Yes, it is true that their clothing was more than just a practical response to their physical condition; it was also symbolic for Jesus covering our sins with His righteousness (Rev. 3:18). So, there is both a literal and a spiritual application. Will we now mar that symbolism? We are ambassadors of the message of the cross (2 Cor. 5:20): could we perhaps help to proclaim that message more clearly, highlight it more brightly, announce it more loudly, through how we dress?

If we could, then why not do so?

Our clothing is more than just clothing; it is a message. It says something about who we are and what we believe. What a privilege to be able to represent the King of Kings! And at the same time — what a huge responsibility!

No, we’re not elevating clothing to a salvation issue, and we’re not turning it into an idol. We’re not going to allow ourselves to become tight-lipped, sour-faced, militaristic controllers who march around frowning at everybody and asking them to adhere to a super-strict dress code that only Jesus Himself could follow without receiving our condemnation (and maybe not even then). No. We’re going to be what truly feminine women are: Gracious.

When we combine modest, caring behavior with modest, feminine dress, flowing from a heart that is motivated by love for God and for others, we can make a powerful, godly impression on our families and on the world around us.

A Conscious Decision

My closet experienced a “radical” transformation in the Spring of 2012. I purged it of most of my pants, leaving only two pairs of jeans for “just in case.” It wasn’t long after, that I realized I didn’t need them, since I could do pretty much anything in a skirt or dress. So, I got rid of the two pants and have been fully skirts-and-dresses only ever since (the only exceptions are my pajama pants, and a few leggings and shorts I use under some of my dresses and skirts).

How Wearing Skirts and Dresses Has Impacted My Life

Has it been hard? Not really, no. I find skirts and dresses very comfortable and practical. What? Skirts and dresses practical? Yes! Especially beneficial for pregnant women, but also helpful for women at any time, loose skirts and dresses are non-restrictive and, if made out of natural fibers, healthy. I actually enjoy wearing skirts and dresses and think I look nice in them. Another plus is that they help hide my “mommy tummy” and have a feminine flowiness that makes me feel beautiful. Wearing skirts and dresses every day has helped boost my femininity; it’s reminded me at all moments that I Am A Woman. There have been minimal negative effects (and these have mostly been from other people and their reactions), and a whole lot of positive results!

The hardest part for me when I first began was in feeling alone, since most Christian ladies I know wear pants. I’ve since then been able to overcome that initial loneliness. Branching out into the online world has helped me find other ladies who think alike, and we have been able to support each other.

On this blog, The Heavenly Hearth, I will share tips and encouragement for living a feminine, modest lifestyle. Many of these articles will focus specifically on how to begin wearing skirts and dresses, and on how to keep going strong, if this is your conviction. My aim is to give you the support you need on your modesty journey!

~Jessica

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Modesty Resources

You can find long skirts and dresses at various local and online stores. If looking online, for example, go to a clothing site and type in “long skirt” or “long dress.” You might be surprised at the affordable options that pop up. Try this on Amazon. However, there are also shops dedicated specifically to modest clothing. I’ve linked to some of them below.

If you know of any other links, please send them my way! It would help me keep this page updated.

➡️Send me a message through the Contact Form.

Modest Clothing (skirts & dresses, blouses, layering tops, etc.):

• Inherit Clothing Company (Variety of modest skirts, dresses, blouses, sweaters, etc.)
• newCreation Women’s Apparel (Regular and maternity skirts, plus a few accessories such as slips. I have several of Sigrid’s maternity skirts, and I love them (!) and have used them successfully throughout various pregnancies. Very affordable and good quality.)
• Kosher Casual (Israel-based shop. Skirts, dresses, undershirts, leggings, sports skirts, etc.)
• Dressing for His Glory (Skirts, skorts, culottes, school uniform skirts, swimwear. High quality and worth the expense. My daughter loves Ceil’s A-line skorts and wears them all the time!)
• Joyfully Sewn Designs (Etsy. Sarah Morris is the owner/seamstress; she is also my Lilla Rose hair accessories stylist! [Her Lilla Rose business is called Simply Feminine.] She offers beautiful, handmade, very modest girls’ clothing. I have had very good experiences working with her in doing product reviews, and as a customer. She will also accept special requests, so if you see anything you would like in a woman’s size, she may be able to accommodate your special order — just ask!)
• Phyllis Jean Modest Clothing (I recommend the blouses and nightgowns, which are modest, beautiful, and well-made, but not necessarily the skirts or leggings, which have elastic of an inconsistent quality. It if wasn’t for the elastic I would heartily recommend the skirts and leggings, too, because I like the pattern so much.)
• Style J Fashion (Denim skirts. Not all of them are modest; you just have to search for ones that are.)
• The Main Street Exchange (Skirts, skorts, school uniform skirts, dresses, tops, shoes, etc.)
• Plain Modesty (Free, customizable patterns for sewing your own Mennonite-style cape dresses and jumpers.)

Modest Scrub Skirts (for medical professions):

• C.Saucy

Modest Swimwear:

• Dressing for His Glory (My daughters have one of their swim dresses, and we really like it. Various styles. Very well made.)
• WholesomeWear (Swim dresses in a jumper style with shirt and shorts attached underneath. I bought one for myself, and it fits great! Very convenient for nursing, as well.)
• Cute and Covered (Pre-made swim dresses for Girls 18 mo through Ladies XXL. Option for buying the pattern alone. Swim fabrics and supplies available.)
• Shein (Links to a page I found on their site by typing in, “Modest swimsuit dress.”)

Books:

• Dressing with Dignity, by Colleen Hammond (Catholic perspective on modestly wearing skirts and dresses.)
• Christian Modesty and the Public Undressing of America, by Jeff Pollard (How the swimsuit industry influenced a trend toward wearing less clothing in public.)

Websites:

• Plain Modesty (Read article: Reasons for Wearing Skirts and Dresses — P.S. She links to my blog at the bottom of her article!)