Since I’m presently thirty-six years old, this might come as a bit of a surprise to you, but this year’s Thanksgiving was only the second I’ve prepared entirely on my own. As a result, it’s maybe taken me longer than most to learn how to “do” Thanksgiving successfully. What did I finally get right? Well, there are three things I think I’ve learned are important if I want us to have an enjoyable Thanksgiving.
#1 Have a plan
For the past seventeen years, I’ve either been pregnant or have had a baby to care for. You can imagine how I’ve felt some of the time: scattered, stressed, and overwhelmed. Not all the time, but enough for me to feel inadequate to the task of trying to get a Thanksgiving menu and activities organized. What changed? For starters, my first couple of children became teenagers. Second, I realized that I was actually capable of doing better. Third, I got inspired.
Have you read Hal and Melanie Young’s Christ-Centered Thanksgiving? (Link goes to their website, but it’s on Amazon, too.) Melanie provides many practical tips based on her experience caring and cooking for a large family. She also includes some organizational aids (these can be copied), which help break down the planning into easy-to-do steps. I really needed that.
Sitting down for thirty minutes to write a menu of what I wanted our meal to include was a first step. Making a shopping list of items I would need came next. Then, I planned which things I would prepare beforehand, and which things I would prepare the day of Thanksgiving, taking into consideration the approximate time it would take me to prepare each dish. Just that little bit of extra planning helped smooth things out immensely.
Melanie also gives ideas for how to keep a biblical, historical focus during this holiday, which is something I wanted to make sure we preserved.
#2 Keep Focused
The story of the Pilgrims — their faith in God, perseverance during hardship, and love for each other — is what I believe should be at the forefront of this celebration. I want our holiday traditions to help build up our faith, to be thoughtful and memorable.
Last year, my kids and I read about the Pilgrims straight from William Bradford’s account. We also read George Washington’s and Abraham Lincoln’s Thanksgiving Proclamations, including some beautiful poems and hymns.
This year I didn’t make time for that, but we did discuss the story of the Pilgrims. Based on part of that story, I served each person five kernels of corn before we ate our Thanksgiving feast, in order to remember to thank God for what we have, even if it’s only a little. It was also good to be reminded how God got the Pilgrims through their time of hardship, just as He has promises to help all those who call upon Him in truth (Psalm 145:18). While I was preparing our meal, I had a YouTube playlist of Thanksgiving songs running in the background.
We watched Disney’s Squanto last year. We enjoyed it, despite some historical inaccuracies. This year, we watched part of Charlie Brown’s Thanksgiving. I think I’d like to buy the DVD for next year. Do you have any other good movies you’d like to recommend for our Thanksgiving movie collection?
#3 Simplify
I know that Thanksgiving is supposed to be about family, and I heartily agree with that, but I’ve found that it helps to keep things simple by setting the day of Thanksgiving aside for just our own family (me, my husband, and our children).
People tend to get stressed out anytime there’s a holiday to plan for. Everybody has expectations for how they want things to be handled, and I can’t make them all happy; they can’t always make me happy, either. I think it’s easier to keep this day a family affair, and then meet up with other family members on another day — Saturday, for example. That reduces the stress by a ton, while still giving us a chance to see our family over Thanksgiving weekend.
I like to be able to get up in the morning at a time that allows me to feel rested; I like that I don’t have to worry about my house being messier than I’d want it to be if I had guests coming over; I like that I don’t feel the need to make my children look cute for company; it’s nice to not have too much noise; I can take a nap if I need to (and I just might, with a small baby that needs almost constant care); and I make only the foods that we all enjoy. No one gets upset at me for being late or not making a certain food how they would have made it. The way we’ve done things these past two years has been a lot more relaxed — so much so, that my husband and I have agreed that we’re going to follow this same approach for every holiday, including Christmas and Easter.
So, doing those three things: having a plan for our meal and activities, keeping focused on the meaning of the holiday, and simplifying the holiday to include just our immediate family on its calendar day (and reserving the weekend for other family) helped me feel that our Thanksgiving was a success. It was peaceful, quiet, and built up our family relationships — what I think of as “homey.”
Our Menu
You may be wondering what we ate. Here was our menu for Thanksgiving 2020:
-Ham with Pineapple chutney (had to try this Indian-style salsa, but wasn’t my favorite — next year, I’ll fix something different)
-Green bean casserole
-Candied sweet potatoes with peanut butter and marshmallows
-Rolls with butter (Hawaiian rolls — I know this is not the same as freshly made, but I really like these, and they’re easy)
-Pumpkin pie and mixed berry pie for dessert, with spiced apple cider to drink
I think that menu is pretty basic, similar to what most people eat for Thanksgiving. I asked my husband what he wanted, and I made only the foods he liked.
- Do you all have any really good Thanksgiving recipes you would like to share? I want to make food that is delicious, but not complicated.
- Also, what have you found that works really well for you and your family on Thanksgiving, besides the food? What went really well this year that you want to do again the next? What would you do differently — anything?
I always love to get your responses!
~Jessica
Such a beautiful family! Thank you for sharing about your Thanksgiving and thank you for sharing the pictures of your children! Their faces radiate contentment. They look like they know they are safe and loved. What a testimony! Congratulations to you and your husband 🙂
Thanks so much, Erika! I really appreciate your very kind words!
~Jessica
You have a beautiful family, Jessica. God bless you all
Thanks, Gloria! So nice to hear that you think so!
~Jessica
Such a beautiful family.
Aww, thank you, Linda!
~Jessica
You look so natural and pretty! Loved seeing the photos of your children and husband. What a beautiful, Godly family. The children are so sweet and look peaceful. I would like your corn pudding recipe! The baby is precious and their names suit each one of them.
That’s so sweet of you, Cynthia! They’re normal children, so they’re not always sweet and peaceful, but they certainly are much of the time. Though things don’t always go smoothly, I can honestly say that I enjoy my children very much.
I’d love to share the corn pudding recipe in a separate post–great idea! Our whole family just loves this recipe!
~Jessica
Your children look so happy and well-loved! 🙂
This year we spent all of November getting ready to sell our house and even got an offer, but prayed and fasted and got the impression that no, we’re not actually supposed to move quite yet so that came screeching to a halt. Anyway, all our stuff is in storage so Thanksgiving was very simple. One friend brought turkey and pie, another brought green beans, and I made stuffing in my crock pot. 🙂 We usually make up a few plates of food and drive around looking for someone who looks like could use a meal, but that didn’t happen this year.
Hi, Jessica! Thanks for all you said and shared in your comment! I love to hear what other ladies are doing as part of keeping the home. Yeah, I understand about sometimes having to keep things very simple. Last year for Thanksgiving, I had the whole thing planned out and it went very well; but, by Christmas I was already feeling nauseous with a new pregnancy, so my plans for that holiday didn’t end up happening. My husband made tamales for all of us, and Mexican hot chocolate, and that was that! But, though simple, it was still very nice.
I like your idea of looking for someone who needs a meal on Thanksgiving. Some people we know volunteer to help serve food at homeless shelters, which I think is nice, too. I’m happy that your friends were so kind and helpful to you and your family this year! I hope you get things settled again soon, and that the Lord leads you and your husband in just the right direction.
~Jessica
Looks like you and your BEAUTIFUL family had a WONDERFUL Thanksgiving! I had a nice small quiet Thanksgiving with my growing brood. Hopefully next year the grandparents can join us.
I saw my midwife the other day: my baby DROPPED! I’m due in 10 days. 😀
Thanks, Courtney! I love small, quiet Thanksgivings!
How exciting that you will be having your new baby soon! I pray that the Lord will put His hand on everything, that He would cause the birth to go smoothly and the postpartum period to be tranquil and enjoyable. Please do let me know when the baby is born, whenever you have a bit of a chance!
~Jessica
Thank you so much for the well wishes!! When you’ve been pregnant, have you noticed when they drop? I’m STILL nursing Sean, with no end in sight. 🙂
You’re welcome, Courtney!
I haven’t ever noticed when my babies drop at the last stage of pregnancy. People tell me that they notice that the baby’s dropped, but I just shrug my shoulders and smile because I don’t feel sure if that’s the case. I think I’ve heard that sometimes the baby won’t drop until right before going into labor, or maybe not until during labor. Of course, I have felt the baby pressing downwards as I near the end of the ninth month, but I don’t know if that counts as him or her having “dropped.”
It’s great that you’re still nursing your little one! If you feel that you can continue, and you’re comfortable with it, then great! You could try tandem nursing both Sean and the new baby and see how that works out for you. It might work out wonderful; and, if you find that it’s just too much, you could probably gradually wean Sean over a period of several weeks so it’s not a shock to him, since your milk supply for the new little one would be a priority. Have you read La Leche League’s book The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding? I recommend it if you haven’t read it yet, since there is a lot of information there about nursing successfully, plus a chapter on tandem nursing.
May God bless your upcoming birth!
~Jessica
So nice to see your reply! 🙂 Sean is 18 months old already! Such a big boy, who LOVES his boobie! I DO have “The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding”. It’s been indispensable!
Oh, good to hear that you do have that book! I imagine that you will probably do just fine tandem nursing. 🙂
~Jessica
Do you have/read “Mothering Your Nursing Toddler”? ANOTHER go to for me.
Courtney, actually I haven’t read that book. Sounds interesting! I have never tandem-nursed any of my children, mostly because the pregnancy stage is usually so exhausting for me, I just gradually stop nursing them at around 1 1/2 years. However, I have seen that in a few cases, perhaps they would have done better if they had been able to nurse longer. I’d like to look that book up!
~Jessica
Hi,Jessica! Very nice article and beautiful photos.Your family looks so happy and blessed. Thanksgiving is less known in my country Japan,(Only some christian churches and mission schools have service or celebration,I guess) so it is so interesting for me to know how you spend the holiday with your family.
Giving thanks is important value for us christians. Christ-centered thanks giving is so good way to celebrate!
Thank you Sanae! I’m happy to hear that you enjoyed my article and found it interesting!
~Jessica
Jessica you have such a lovely family! I love to see all those smiling faces.
My husband and I are now empty nesters (sad face) so this year we went to my daughters for Thanksgiving.
It was so nice to see her using the skills she learned during homeschooling “cooking” class! *smile* Everything was so good. Your menu looks very good as well! Especially the ham with pineapple…yummy!
I think one of the best things about Thanksgiving is that all the food and fellowship is made with love because of Jesus.
God Bless you all & thank you for sharing!
You’re welcome, Rosemarie! I appreciate the lovely remarks you made regarding my family and our Thanksgiving meal!
I’m pleased to hear that you had a nice Thanksgiving with your daughter this year. How wonderful that she remembered what you taught her during her homeschool years! I love to visit with my parents and adult siblings and their families–the only problem for me is limited space in our very small home, which makes it very hard to have large groups over. But I have nothing at all against celebrating with family! In fact, I hope that when I’m an empty-nester, my children will invite us over to their homes, too!
~Jessica
Loved what you did here – especially the simplifying! It’s true, a lot of stress from a holiday can come from impending guests. 🙂 I loved your simple menu, as well – it looked awesome!
Aww, thank you, Diana! I’m no expert–very far from it! This is just what I’ve found works for me, so far. And yes, keeping it simple is a real sanity-saver!
~Jessica